“Not every opportunity is meant to be my assignment.”

~ Lysa Terkeurst

This quote really spoke to me, and it helped me remember something I often tell my audiences. Just because you can, doesn’t mean you should. The helper in each of us wants to do good, even when the task may not be in our job description. Even if the task takes you away from something more important. And even if the task could easily be done by someone else.

There’s nothing wrong with helping unless it’s not helping you get through your own to-do, or if you end up feeling resentful for the lost time, or if you … well, there are a lot of situations where saying yes might cause you stress…so it’s worth paying attention to.

In my first week of exploring saying NO, I’ve learned some pretty eye-opening lessons, and in this video I share three of them!

Watch the video below, or read the transcript that follows, and tell me which resonates one with most you!

Hey Michelle Cederberg here out for a morning walk with my faithful hound Islay. She’s going to find a spot to chew on her stick.

I’m reporting back on the first week of my helping hiatus. Some of you, if you watched last week’s video, know that I’m taking the month of April and perhaps beyond, to say no to helping. Which really feels weird. So I’m reporting back some of my findings because it’s been quite interesting.

NO, doesn’t always mean no.

In this first week I’ve realized that in instituting this helping hiatus, it doesn’t mean that I’m not allowed to help, but what I’ve been very aware of is that if I pause long enough to really think about the ask, I can I can say yes with more certainty. I’ll talk more about that in a future video.

If they don’t ask, DON’T OFFER!

Another awareness that I had was that if I say, ‘Hey can I give you a hand with that.’ before I’ve even been asked if I can help, that’s akin to saying yes. So, I’m practicing not offering my help until it’s asked for. How about that? The caregiver in all of us will sometimes do that, especially if we believe that we can be of assistance, but if they’re not asking for help, don’t offer your help. That was a big one for me.

Don’t undervalue yourself against others.

The next realization I had is that my husband and I are both self-employed, and for whatever reason, rather than asking him for help I will just do the thing, as if to say that his time is more more valuable than mine. But it’s not, and so I’ve been trying to be more aware of not taking on everything and asking him for help more often, because he’s very helpful when I ask him… and that’s the truth.

You can say YES…later.

The last thing I’m going to share this week is that no can mean, ‘No, not right now.‘ I realize that NO, I don’t need to answer ‘this’ email the moment it lands in my inbox. NO, I don’t have to be reactive to every email in my inbox. I can stop and and block my time to do the things that are important to me now, and get back to my emails later. That little awareness reminded me to stop giving all my time away to low priority reactionary tasks rather than really focusing on the things that are going to make an impact in my workday.

So there you go. Three (well 4 actually) lessons learned (so far) in my helping hiatus journey. More to come I’m sure.

If there are strategies you use in order to say NO when you should be focusing on your own yes, then share in the comments.

Until next time I’m Michelle Cederberg reminding you that in order to Ignite High Performance sometimes you’ve got to take back a little bit of your time for the things that matter to YOU.

I’m booking 2024 speaking engagements across North America RIGHT NOW. If you’d like to chat about how to bring me in to your organization to help your team eliminate burnout, increase engagement, and ignite high performance, pop me an email at hello@michellecederberg.com. I’d love to chat.

In fact… I’ve got a NEW KEYNOTE and you can learn about it here: MichelleSPEAKS_2024

Don’t forget to join me on my social channels below.

Resources Galore!

1) Hey, I’m super excited to share a great product that I can’t wait for you all to see. It’s my new Success-Energy Equation mouse pad. Remember the equation? Some of you have seen it. Links to purchase are below. SO FUN!

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2) Don’t forget to check out my new ‘What’s Your Motivation Type?’ QUIZ!  Click the link and answer 5 quick questions to identify your Motivation Type. It’s going to give you daily doses of inspiration based on your category, and you’ll get all sorts of resources along the way.

3) Buy my new book via my website and I’ll send you a signed copy!

4) Sign up for my socials below, because there’s all sorts of interesting stuff coming down the pipe.

 

 

Michelle Cederberg, Health and Productivity Expert, MKin, BA Psyc, CEP, CPCC
Hall of Fame Speaker, CSP, Certified Coach & Best-Selling Author

 

ENERGIZING TEAMS FOR THE FUTURE OF WORK

Using science-based strategies to eliminate burnout, increase engagement, and ignite high performance


www.michellecederberg.com
403-850-5589

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