“Self-care means giving the world the best of you instead of what is left of you.”

~ Katie Reed

This quote speaks to me. It makes sense that we want to give the world the best of ourselves, so we work hard and put ourselves out there, and in the process we set aside self-care. As a result, our efforts fall flat, and have the opposite effect we intended.

This is where burnout lives, and I have a theory as to why it happens. Watch the short video below to hear my answer, or read  the transcript that follows, and let me know if you agree.

Don’t forget to complete my new ‘Motivation Type’ QUIZ to identify YOUR motivation type. Click here to answer 5 quick questions, and the results will land in your inbox!

Let’s do this!

Hey, Michelle Cederberg here, continuing the conversation around burnout and how it can sneak into the lives of healthy, aware individuals …like me.

Last week, I talked about the fact that in the last six to eight months, the malaise that I was feeling around work and life was probably burnout. Which was very interesting for me, because as a Health and Productivity Expert, I would have expected that I would have had an awareness, that I would have recognized the signs, but well, I clearly did not. So, it got me thinking about why, and I landed on resilience.

Interestingly, it’s not that I didn’t have enough resilience to get through. It’s, in fact, that I had too much.

Let me explain. We often get told when we’re busy and stressed, “You need more resilience.” I respectfully disagree. In fact, what if resilience isn’t the answer? I think it’s part of the problem because when we’re resilient, we take on more. We push the limits. We say yes. We do one more thing… we do one more thing… we do one more thing.

And we don’t necessarily stop and give ourselves grace or pause. We just go because we can. I know that many of you can relate. Resilient people push through the work, and they push through difficult situations, and sometimes they do that without recognizing their limits or prioritizing self care.

So, let’s take a look at the definition of resilience.

re·​sil·​ience (noun)
:The ability to adapt and recover from stressful or challenging situations.

It’s an accurate definition, but here’s the reason why it can be a problem. It’s that ‘adapt word’. Because we’re able to adapt, because we’re able to pivot on the dime, because we’re able to shift when we need to, we take on more. We do one more thing. We say yes when we shouldn’t, and we forget the second part of this definition, which is to recover.

We have lots of resilience, so we keep on going. Resilience isn’t the problem. How we use it is.

If you’re feeling this, if you are identifying at all with, “Oh my gosh, the reason why I’m feeling this way is because my resilience has pushed me into saying yes more often than I should” I’m going to give you four quick on-the-spot check-ins you can do.

1) PAUSE
The first thing I started doing when I was feeling malaise and burnout was to spend more time thinking about how I was feeling. More often than not, I’d think, ‘Gosh, you’re tired. You’re not as excited about work. You’re really not into this day, are you?’

We need to pause long enough to listen to what our body and mind are telling us. You may not like the answers, but hopefully they will give you some inkling as to what you need to do. When your body tells you what it needs, listen.

2) Take your breaks
I say this a lot. It’s one of the things that I think most of us skip and we shouldn’t. When you take a proper break, your body and brain get necessary recover time. Don’t go from computer screen to phone screen though. Go outside, breathe in some fresh air. Have something healthy to eat, have conversations with somebody. Read a book with pages you actually have to turn.

3) Remember to breathe
If you don’t have time to take a break, then at least give your brain and body the oxygen it needs. When we’re stressed, when we are stretched, when we are feeling that burnout creep in, we breathe in the upper third of our lungs. We don’t take the time for a full, cleansing breath of air. Breathe deeply, four to 6 seconds in, four to 6 seconds out.

Slow down, even if it’s just a quick two-minute timeout. Press yourself against the wall, or lean back in your chair and fill your lungs with energizing oxygen.

It’s amazing how much energy these little micro-hits of self care can give you. All you need is enough time to recognize the signs of stress creeping in, or to rejuvenate just a bit, or to get back on track.

4) Connect with people who lift you.

When stress is high (and even when it’s not) it’s important to connect with people you love, people who you enjoy spending time with, and people who have your back. Positive connections like these cause our body to release oxytocin, a happy hormone that helps you feel more calm and content, less fearful and stressed, and more focused and energized. I’ve had great conversations with some good friends over the last weeks since I put the message out, and it was heartwarming and helpful to me.

Let people know how you’re feeling. And don’t just wash over your emotions with, “I’m fine”, because the right people will support you.

We’re going to talk more about burnout in the weeks ahead, but in the meantime, I’m Michelle Cederberg, helping you Ignite High Performance in small steps… in marvelous micro-hits of self care.

Don’t forget to check out my new ‘What’s Your Motivation Type?’ QUIZ! Scan the QR code or click the link and answer 5 quick questions to identify your Motivation Type. It’s going to give you daily doses of inspiration based on your category, and you’ll get all sorts of resources along the way.

‘What’s your Motivation Type?’

Resources Galore!